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 I am not the person who love to type and describe too much. 

Well, this time I want to share about how I see love in my life this time. I keep thinking that 26 yo, is it mature already or nah? 

Semakin hari semakin berubah - ubah pikiran tentang pasangan hidup. Seharusnya semakin yakin or looking someone serious, so I'm not really wasting my time. Ada dua versi yang ada di otak ku saat ini

#1 Every girls have their own dream prince and me either. Beberapa wish list date ku sudah check list like sunset date, sunbathe, canoeing, cycling, movie, cooking, timezone, dancing in the kitchen, jogging, sunrise, sing a song. Masih ada beberapa yang belum terpenuhi, ada dua wish yang aku pengen banget do it, long drives then carpool and Lantern Festival. So dari wish tersebut timbulah kriteria - kriteria lelaki idaman. It's so clear, lelaki yang love me as me but it's okay if you want me be a better version of me but wait it's take times. He is a caring person, sweet, funny, gentle, mature, simple but stylish and kind! Oh maybe bit being a paparazzi for me. That's it. Enough.

#2 Trauma. Satu kata yang menggambarkan aku saat ini, yes percintaan ku tidak pernah mulus dan bertahan lama. I'm still thinking "what's wrong?" Apakah too much love itu salah ? Do I deserve the same love like I give? Setiap kali aku ingin membuka hati, I keep asking it again and again. Bukan nya aku gak mau membuka hati but I try it but I can not push it. Need time, indeed but aku sudah merasa give up dan memilih untuk if being alone is better then I will be alone forever. This is my comfort zone this time. Bahkan I feel like it's not interesting anymore about in relationship. 

C - Feb 22

< / 3 Virgo

 26 years old, unlucky <3 story.

Aku pernah merasa dicintai oleh seseorang di masa junior high school. Maybe it was my first love. I don't know exactly. Tapi I felt it was love from someone that I love too. I remember, di hari itu di keramaian dia menggandeng tangan ku. It was sweet! He treat me like I am the only one for him. Not only it, dia setia menemani ku kemanapun aku mau. Contoh kecilnya, dia rela mengantar aku pergi course dan take me back home. Pick me up to nemenin dia makan nasi goreng kesukaan nya walaupun bungkus dan eat it at my home. Last thing that I truly remember, naik sepeda on saturday night karena aku random dan pengen aja gitu. He did it for me. Till he found his way to his home and congrats he is happy right now.

Oh finally after few years, I found it again in someone else. Teramat sangat romantis dari sebelumnya. I can't say anything but Thank You. Siapa yang mau nemenin orang yang lagi dihukum dan jalan di bawah terik matahari buat speech? only him. Cuma 2 minggu doang memories nya tapi udah berasa many years together. Ada hal - hal yang emang unexpected, waktu aku tidur dengan kaki lurus ke arah hand break then dia minggirin kaki aku dan he hold it to keep it warm. Meet me every night to dinner together. Holding my hand to guide me to the beach. God, terlalu cepat. Late night call till morning, super crazy. Again and again, He found his way back to his home. I wish he's happy right now.

This one should be the last one after 4 years. Percaya ga sih, maybe selama ini kita banyak getting close with many people but it's different when you found someone that truly you feel it right. Yeahhhhhh I found him! Dia enggak se romantis yang lain nya. But he is the winner of this heart, hehe. I can feel that I am be the best version of me when I am with him. So many surprise yang diberikan ke aku. Aku banyak belajar dari dia. I love it! He is just different, maybe holding hands was just ordinary thing for me. Watch the sunsets and sunrise, cycling, swim and so many things we did. Laughs and cries together. Damn God, I wanna grow old with him. Tapi aku gak tahu, mungkin for him I am too much or over react. Till someday he wont it, it was nothing for him. It just memories that never happen again. I wish I can meet whoever that made my love story, I want this guy will be my last forever. Remember, whenever you go, I always be your home. 

C - Jan 2022

SUPER GLITTER

SUPER GLITTER